Post Semester Post

Originally, when I started the class, I was very pumped to finally learn more about relating art to music. This has always been something I've been interested in. However, I felt that my expectations were quite different from the reality of the class. I think I came into the class expecting more of a studio class, working together with fellow classmates and having longer term projects. Although it was nice that the art making was a personal take, it would have been nice to spend some time learning how other people work -- not just the final product, but the process as well. 

In terms of the music, it is definitely music that I would not listen to on my own, so it was quite interesting. I learned a lot about the history of American music though, some coming from British poets, and some just coming from generation to generation with no one source. I had never thought about how music from the past is shared with us in the present -- the process of cataloging is both interesting and important to our culture. 

The speed at which the class went, I believe, was a bit too fast for me. Cranking out one project per week was difficult, especially since I do not have a studio space to work in. Sometimes I wanted to work with oil, but the drying time just took too long for weekly projects. So I think that slightly long-term projects is how I typically work -- many layers to a piece. But I think it was interesting to see what I could create given little time and little space. It made me think a little more outside the box in terms of what materials and what ideas I could work with. I will definitely use what I learned in my future art making, whether it be working with newspaper or working with glass. 

Week 13-14: Sea Shanties

Sea shanties are sailors songs that they sang while hard at work at sea.

When I think of sailors, I think of these musty colors, a raw canvas color, tans, browns, and muted blues and greens. These colors remind me of something used, something that has been worn down, but is still vibrant in its own way. Water damage, perhaps. I went for quite a literal translation of the sea shanties, as I do appreciate the structure of a ship on top of wild, uncontrollable and loose waters. As for the glass, I really enjoy the image of a ship in a bottle or a message in a bottle. These are both images that come to mind when I heard the songs. A ship in a bottle often contains the ship in its entirety, but I allowed the ship to extend past the glass because I feel as though such a powerful ship cannot be defined by physical limits.

Week 12

Howlin' Wolf - How Many More Years

"What is the blues? When you ain't got no money, you got the blues. When you ain't got no money to pay your house with, you still got the blues... If you ain't got no money you got the blues, cause you thinkin' evil. Every time you thinkin' evil you got the blues."

Lyrics:

How many more years?
Have I got to let you dog me around
How many more years?
Oh, I got to let you dog me around
I'd soon rather be dead
Sleeping six feet in the ground

I'm gonna fall on my knees
I'm gonna raise up my right hand
I'm gonna fall on my knees
I'm gonna raise up my right hand
Say, I'd feel much better, darlin'
If you'd just only understand

I'm goin' upstairs
I'm gonna bring back down my clothes
I'm goin' upstairs
I'm gonna bring back down my clothes, do them all
If anybody ask about me
Just tell 'em I walked out on


Since we are exploring the blues this week, I wanted to explore the color. 

Week 11

I'm not sure I found the reading this week particular inspiring in relation to the readings of the past couple of weeks -- it was a lot of specific daily life and human interaction description. I think I much preferred learning about the musicians themselves (I.e.: Leadbelly's biography and history were interesting and learned a lot of background on how he was received and how he carried himself in the musical world. 

However, the reading, personally, was not something I think that furthers the context of the blues music -- a lot of words just to say that the blues music is the musical expression of feeling, of hard times, and the community created a sense of family within the blues world. 

What did catch my attention was the hospitality of the black families. They welcomed Ferris with kindness, a place to stay, people to talk to. He was unofficially inducted into the blues family, regardless of race. That touched me, especially in the time we live in now, where everyone pretty much keeps to themselves until they need something from someone else. But this community actively welcomed strangers into the lives.

I thought it was slightly amusing how the blacks were confused about the record player and refused to speak when the music was playing, in fear of the white people listening into their conversations.

I thought Careless Love was interesting because it shares some of the same lyrics as Goodnight Irene. "You cause me to weep, you cause me to mourn." It's a very sad song, talking about loving until one loses his mind, death, digging one's grave.

For this week, I chose Sweet Home Chicago. However, I tried to put it in today's context.

Week 10: Woody Guthrie

I really admire Woody Guthrie's take on his music, and I believe there should be more people like him especially in the current music industry. A lot of songs nowadays focus on being thin, being perfect, being up to society's standards in appearance and materialism. These qualities are often impossible for the regular person. Songs often ask for girls to be looser, to not be a prude -- but if they're too slutty, that's also bad. Songs often asks guys to be this one dimensional masculine figure, getting all the girls and being fit. These are not realistic. These are not the things that are important in creating a healthy outlook on life. This over saturation of what we're supposed to be overpowers what we are actually like, which is why I really appreciate how Woody Guthrie words his sentiments:

"I hate a song that makes you think that you're not any good. I hate a song that makes you think you are just born to lose. No good to nobody. No good for nothing. Because you are either too old or too young or too fat or too slim or too ugly or too this or too that. Songs that run you down r songs that poke fun at you on account of your bad luck or hard traveling."

"I am out to sing songs that will prove to you that this is your world...I am out to sing the songs that make you take pride in yourself and in your work."

"Woody, being an excellent journalist, described not a world as it might be but as it was." Woody was more of a realist than a dreamer, and I think that is part of his charm. His music and lyrics show people that it's totally fine for them to be struggling, to be living this truthful life. He does not put people down for what they're going through and he doesn't idealize a certain type of person. Everyone is equal and should have the opportunity to blossom in their own right.

For this week I chose Guthrie's This Land is Your Land. It was a song I grew up singing in elementary school, and I really liked the simple tune of the song. Since it was such an important song in my primary school days, I wanted to convey that simple, childlike sense into the artwork. I also wanted to show a sense of constancy/universality -- how although the buildings and areas of the world have their own quality, their own shape, they are all represented with the same thin black line. Through all the differences, we are all inherently of the same strokes, just in a different order.

Week 9: Leadbelly

There was a lot of information for this week in terms of reading and in terms of listening and video. However, all of this information gave me a deeper look into Leadbelly's life and how Lomax fit into that life. One part of the reading that stuck out to me was Alan's introduction into the song collecting line of work that his father was in. He realized that by collecting these songs, he wasn't just a folk song collector, but he was a messenger for the masses. He helped these tenant farmers (a great visual that was offered in Chapter 2: Road Scholars) communicate to the broader world. They were not longer the unheard majority, but they now had a voice. In this spirit, Alan didn't stop when he hit barriers. When he couldn't get into the first prison he wanted to visit to find songsters, he tried again and again. He wrote letters beforehand to guarantee prison entry, instead of being shut down when he got to the gate.

Huddie Ledbetter was described as the King of the 12 String; the name Leadbelly came from his life of toughness, his confidence, pride and intelligence. Just like Mississippi John Hurt, he learned instruments as a child. Similarly, he worked on farms and in the industry, doing odd jobs and performing here and there. However, Leadbelly wanted to get paroled to work for Lomax; Lomax was hesitant to take on a challenge such as Leadbelly, and he didn't have the means to help Leadbelly get out of jail.

The one part I didn't like about Leadbelly's story was how he was described in the media. They called him the "Murderous Minstrel" and he was skilled with the "knife and guitar." I did not appreciate these descriptions because it highlighted his past rather than what he was doing at the time. Sure, those headlines serve as a more hard-hitting story, but it sells Leadbelly short. People focus on the fact that he was a violent man, that he committed crimes, but that is not why people are fascinated by him -- they should be focusing more on his craft than the fact that he had been in jail. I suppose these are opinions of the modern time; Leadbelly seemed to be pleased by all the headlines.

Lyrics:

Yonder comes Miss Rosie. How in the world do you know?
Well, I know her by the apron and the dress she wore.
Umbrella on her shoulder, piece of paper in her hand,
Well, I'm callin' that Captain, "Turn a-loose my man."

Let the Midnight Special shine her light on me.
Oh let the Midnight Special shine her ever-lovin' light on me.

When you gets up in the morning, when that big bell ring.
You go marching to the table, you meet the same old thing.
Knife and fork are on the table, ain't nothing in my pan.
And if you say a thing about it, you have a trouble with the man.

Let the Midnight Special shine her light on me.
Oh let the Midnight Special shine her ever-lovin' light on me.

If you ever go to Houston, boy, you better walk right,
And you better not squabble and you better not fight.
Benson Crocker will arrest you, Jimmy Boone will take you down.
You can bet your bottom dollar that you're penitentary bound.

Let the Midnight Special shine her light on me.
Oh let the Midnight Special shine her ever-lovin' light on me.

Well, jumping Little Judy, she was a mighty fine girl.
She brought jumping to this whole round world.
Well, she brought it in the morning just a while before day.
Well, she brought me the news that my wife was dead.
That started me to grieving, whooping, hollering, and crying.
And I began to worry about my very long time.

Let the Midnight Special shine her light on me.
Oh let the Midnight Special shine her ever-lovin' light on me.

For this week's project, I decided on Midnight Special. I believe the song refers to a passenger train. This passenger train is a symbol of the hope for escape -- when a train passes by, it may spark the thought of it as a way to go home. In the song, every day is the same: everything is in the same place, same routine, no food in the pan. But he can't complain about it, or there would be consequences. It's a life of following the rules, where the law stares a man down to be on his best behavior. I liked the reference to Jumping (little) Judy in the song -- how she gave sad news; she is also an "evil" character in Leadbelly's "Jumpin' Judy," where she treats him bad as well.

I enjoy the lyric "Let the Midnight Special shine her light on me/Oh let the Midnight Special shine her ever-lovin' light on me." It suggests an imagery of a train passing by. That light is consistently there; reliable at a certain time -- "ever-lovin'" light, particularly. Light is also a symbol of hope, the future, something good. Light gives brightness to the dark, hope in a sad place.

Week 8: Harry Smith's Anthology of American Folk Music

I found this week's reading very interesting -- reading the summaries about each song's lyrics was the most entertaining of the read. My favorite one is probably "Gaudy woman lures child from playfellows; stabs him as victim dictates message to parents" because it is so bizarre. It's such a strange idea when condensed into short clauses, but it probably holds a heavier emotion or message when listening to the entirety of the song. Another one that caught my attention was "Father finds daughter's body with note attached when railroad boy mistreats her." Again, it is so strange, but this one in particular sounds like the beginning of a crime or revenge-driven film. This plays well into a ballad; telling a story through music.
Many of the songs address the sins of women and suggest their tragic deaths, many of which were not their fault, but they were mistreated by their significant other. Most, if not all, of the songs have sad outcomes: losing life, farm, crops, love, jobs; with themes of regret or deception. I thought it quite strange that there are songs about unemployment, deaths of presidents and politics. Nowadays, there aren't songs like these -- so reading even the summaries about these songs was strange.

Fifty Miles of Elbow Room
By Rev. F.W. McGee
Lots of room for you and me on the other side.
Starts and ends with a chorus. Congregational style singing; voices overpower the piano, violin and clapping; lyrics hard to understand from the main duet; layered and free singing.

Fishing Blues
By Henry Thomas
Can catch more fish than you; going fishing.
Solo singer; features some type of woodwind instrument; quick upbeat tempo.
Discography: Texas Worried Blues: Completed Recorded Works 1927-1929

Spike Driver Blues
By Mississippi John Hurt
John Henry was a steel driver; he's gone.
Light guitar; ends abruptly.
Discography: Avalon Blues: The Complete 1928 OKeh Recordings

Project 7: Louis Collins

Lyrics:

Mrs. Collins weeped, Mrs. Collins moaned,
To see her son Louis leavin' home
The angels laid him away
The angels laid him away,
They laid him six feet under the clay
The angels laid him away

Mrs. Collins weeped, Mrs. Collins moaned,
To see her son Louis leavin' home
The angels laid him away
Oh, Bob shot once and Louis shot too,
Shot poor Collins, shot him through and through
The angels laid him away

Oh, kind friends, oh, ain't it hard?
To see poor Louis in a new graveyard
The angels laid him away
The angels laid him away,
They laid him six feet under the clay
The angels laid him away

Oh, when they heard that Louis was dead
All the people they dressed in red
The angels laid him away
The angels laid him away,
They laid him six feet under the clay
The angels laid him away

Mrs. Collins weeped, Mrs. Collins moaned,
To see her son Louis leavin' home
The angels laid him away
The angels laid him away,
They laid him six feet under the clay
The angels laid him away

This song is very interesting -- I enjoyed the lyrics. Mrs. Collins stood by idly, weeping and moaning, as her own son was leavin' home when the angels laid him away. There was nothing she could do but watch. The way the song is sung and the fact that the angels "laid him away," as opposed to buried him or took him, emphasizes a slow progression of events. It sounds peaceful because no one really protests the facts; things just happen and people can't fight it.
I kind of see myself as Mrs. Collins, in some strange way. I used my art this week as a sort of release for my frustrations and I am happy with what came out of it. Not sure if I completely love the text, so I left it in a temporary manner.

I quite enjoyed Jas Olbrecht's biography on Mississippi John Hurt. It painted him in a very bright light -- he came from humble beginnings, working on the farm and helping his mother in a small town of under 100 people. He worked very hard on his own family farm, and also offered his services on neighboring farms. I had just learned about the WPA in another class, so it is interesting to see the overlap between that class and this class. It was interesting that Jas mentioned that Hurt's music is a souvenir of his childhood. It is an interesting idea -- that we never forget our childhood; in those formative years, we learn so much about ourselves and the people around us shape who we become. John Hurt grew up in a rural area, helping people, starting from the ground up and earning his way to the top. He was also described as "perfect" and "Christ-like"; somehow I believe that is related to his childhood experiences, helping others and perfecting his craft when he had time.

Project 6: Down By the Salley Gardens

Lyrics:

Oh down by the Salley Gardens, my love and I did meet.
She passed the Salley Gardens, with little snow-white feet.
She bid me take love easy, as the leaves grow on the tree,
But I being young and foolish, with her I did not agree.

In a field down by the river, my love and I did stand
An on my leaning shoulder, she placed her snow-white hand.
She bid me take love easy, as the leaves grow on the tree,
But I being young and foolish, and now I am full of tears.

Oh down by the Salley Gardens, my love and I did meet.
She passed the Salley Gardens, with little snow-white feet.
She bid me take love easy, as the leaves grow on the tree,
But I being young and foolish, with her I did not agree.


I find it very interesting that this ballad, like all other folk songs, traveled by mouth and therefore deviated from the original source. The original source is William Butler Yeats' poem with the same title. However, upon further research, I found that Yeats had based his writings on what he remembered from another song that an old lady sang in a village. Yeats had originally named his poem: "An Old Song Re-Sung." But this begs the question of where that old lady got it from -- had she written it? Or had she learned it from her father, friend, just by chance? This got me thinking about if ideas are ever really new -- when ideas come to us, inspiration for that had probably come from something else. There must be a source, but how do we know exactly what that source is? In today's world, especially, we are already surrounded by so many types of media, technologies, sounds and sights; how do we know if an idea is truly ours? Our "new" ideas are a combination of what we already know and our current worldview, facts and pre-existing ideas lightly filtered through our own minds. Intellectual property and intellectual copyright is very hard to pinpoint and justify, if it can be pinpointed at all.

I appreciated that the reading (Mike Yates on Cecil Sharp) created a sort of a timeline or diary, if you will; I found it much easier to understand the course of events. It is very impressive that Cecil took on such a big project, almost by himself, getting sponsorships, getting sick, yet still continuing on his mission. Just the passion behind that is monumental, but his contribution to American music is even greater. One of the lines that caught my attention was: "the cult of singing traditional songs is far more alive than it is in England." In today's context, cult immediately brings up cult films and cult TV shows with strong fan bases and followings. Cult is a strong word, but also fitting for the tight group of musicians from the Appalachians who preserved these traditional songs. I also thought the age gap between the English versus American singers was interesting -- in England, the singers were elderly, while American singers could have been as young as 15. Perhaps this was one of the reasons that the tradition was more "alive" in America.

Project 5: Can the Circle Be Unbroken

Lyrics:
(The Carter Family / Clarence Ashley & Doc Watson)

I was standing by my window

On one cold and cloudy day

And I saw the hearse come rolling

For to carry my mother away

Can the circle be unbroken

Bye and bye, Lord, bye and bye

There's a better home a-waiting

In the sky, Lord, in the sky

Oh, I told the undertaker

Undertaker, please drive slow

For this body you are hauling

How I hate to see her go

Can the circle be unbroken

Bye and bye, Lord, bye and bye

There's a better home a-waiting

In the sky, Lord, in the sky

I followed close beside her

Tried to hold up and be brave

But I could not hide my sorrow

When they laid her in the grave

Can the circle be unbroken

Bye and bye, Lord, bye and bye

There's a better home a-waiting

In the sky, Lord, in the sky

Went back home Lord, my home was lonesome
missed my mother she was gone
all my brothers, sisters cry in'
What a home so sad and lone

Can the circle be unbroken

Bye and bye, Lord, bye and bye

There's a better home a-waiting

In the sky, Lord, in the sky

I found the Carter Family's version of the song very interesting because it has an upbeat tempo to convey a song about death (and potential rebirth or life in heaven). It almost makes me forget about the content of the song and encourages me to hum along with a happy tune. This reminded me of Adorno's writings about popular music -- popular music distracts listeners from the realities and responsibilities of their own lives and gives them a temporary (and false) sense of happiness or relaxation. It seems the core of the song is showing that despite the death, she will be going to a better place in the sky -- the hope outweighs the sadness.
However, Clarence Ashley and Doc Watson's version slows down the tempo, making the song more emotional. It sounds somewhat like a plea, asking the Lord if the circle will be unbroken and grasping at the idea that "There's a better home a-waiting/in the sky." The careful layering of deeper voices makes the song seem more haunting and dramatic -- sounds like people are personally affected by the death of the mother. In this version, it seems sadness is more prevalent than hope.

For this project, I responded more to Clarence Ashley and Doc Watson's version of the song. I wanted to explore a darker and more illustrative side -- something very Supernatural-esque. I added a woman in white to represent the spirit of the mother, since I've always been intrigued by that myth and it's countless versions.

Project 4: Oh Mary Don't You Weep

Song: 

For this week, I chose Swan Silvertones' version "Oh Mary Don't You Weep." I really like their sound because it surrounds me with a sort of "classic" atmosphere, and their words are clearly enunciated, which is what I actively look for in the music that I listen to.  I also enjoy the high notes that are scattered in the middle and the end of the song. I also did enjoy Max Romeo's Pama Reggae version, but unfortunately I could not understand exactly he was saying, and thus I could not quite understand the lyric changes. 

As for biblical references -- I did not grow up with any religious background, so reading more in depth about Mary, Martha and Lazarus is new to me. Although I cannot personally connect with these passages, I definitely do have respect for what they stand for and what music they inspire. Whether learning the songs at Sunday schools, at churches or from people on the road, it proves how powerful music can be -- people form a community and are united by words and songs and lyrics (as well as faith). Traveling all over the country, the lyrics of the songs may have changed here and there, but the truth of the songs still remain and resonate with their listeners. I am fascinated mostly by the reading from "The Souls of Black Folk" -- they are brought together by struggle, sorrow and song. There is a real gravity to their songs; even just reading the lyrics, I can feel the hardship, but can also see their hope that the Lord will guide the way. 

This particular quote caught my eye: "Our song, our toil, our cheer, and warning have been given to this nation in blood-brotherhood."

For this project, I decided to focus on how the music made me feel rather than what the song actually means lyrically. I wanted to explore the idea of a more abstract response, which is not something I am typically used to. This piece is an oil painting on a small canvas.

I focused more on the tones and notes, and I attempted to give them a physicality, which is one of the reasons I chose a thick canvas this time; I imagined bright thin lines for high, held out notes and darker, deeper and bolder strokes for lower vocals. I also wanted to create 3 layers -- a low contrast one for the background voices ("oh Mary don't you weep"), a bold layer the main vocals, and accents for the variety of vocal embellishments. I chose red as the base color because the voices in the song emit a sort of warmth and comfort. As for the black and gray, I wanted to try to create a bolder feel. I wanted to illustrate the high tones and embellishments of the song in a brighter color, which is why I chose a yellow. It was more successful in theory than in reality.

I'm not 100% convinced that I was successful in creating what I had in mind, perhaps it is the colors that I chose -- but it does not have the feeling that I imagined in my head. I could not find the right lines/shapes for each layer; it somehow turned out more violent than I pictured, but perhaps that is a result of my frustration with working in a new way. What started out as a calm piece suddenly turned into a more, almost scary, piece in the end. Rather than painting how I felt about the music, I began to paint my personal feelings toward the painting process; I think I was successful in showing this frustration -- anger, almost. Although a small piece, it is probably one of the most frustrating ones I've done, which reminded me a lot of how I felt last year, when I was struggling to find myself. I guess this piece (like the songs), although unintentionally, shows how even in the darkness, there will be at least a little light, some semblance of hope of finding a way out. Hopefully this class will help me find where I want to go artistically -- I hope that doing (sometimes experimental) pieces weekly will accelerate this process.

Project 3: My Desire

Lyrics:

It's my desire to do some good thing every day.
It's my desire to help the fallen by the way.
Oh, it's my desire to bring back those who've gone astray.
It's my desire, oh, to be like the Lord.

It's my desire to bring someone drunk to the fold.
It's my desire to shelter someone from the cold.
It's my desire to do thy will, Lord, as I am told.
It's my desire, oh, Lord, to be like my Lord.

Yes, It's my desire, to see His face when life is done.
It's my desire to meet the Father, yes and the Son.
It's my desire to hear Him say, "My Child, well done."
It's my desire, oh, Hallelujah, to be like the Lord.

I chose the song "My Desire" by Delois Barrett Campbell, and upon hearing it, I imagined the performer standing in front of a stained glass window. For this project, I decided to expand my color palette and to see if I could still create a unified piece by using virtually every color of the rainbow. Still using a 6x8" canvas board, I wanted to try to illustrate something that was much bigger than its physical size. 

I contemplated filling in the two large circles outlined in green with either more colors or perhaps a human portrait or figure (perhaps Paul Walker or my mother, people I look up to who have embodied the seemingly perfect "good" that I want to be). In the end, I decided against it because I felt that would go with the lyrics more -- no matter how many good deeds you perform, there's always a desire to do something greater. At whatever stage, there are still so many pieces of one's life that haven't been filled in yet. There's always something more that can be done, to make your or perhaps someone else's life more colorful. 

Project 2: You Are My Sunshine

Lyrics:

The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms
When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken,
And I hung my head and cried.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You'll never know, dear, how much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away.

I'll always love you and make you happy
If you will only say the same
But if you leave me and love another
You'll regret it all someday.

You told me once, dear, you really loved me
And no one could come between
But now you've left me to love another
You have shattered all of my dreams.

For this project, I worked with oil color on canvas board (6x8"). I wanted to experiment more with color, so I only used French Ultramarine, Cadmium Red and Cadmium Yellow. With this piece, I wanted to convey emotion, both with the subject and the colors. It's called "You Were My Sunshine."
My jumping off point was the emotion I got from listening to the song -- a longing, a sadness. I took lyrics that hit me the hardest, and illustrated them through a single figure. Originally, I wanted to utilize a monochrome palette, using only shades of indigo to convey that sadness. However, I thought it would be more dynamic if I added the yellow to represent the sunshine. I wanted to show that the sunshine was fading, and it was only touching him on the slightest of spots. The sunshine does not reach where his heart or his face are, and I think that could show that his sunshine has gone away and shattered all his dreams.

Project 1: Down in the Valley

Lyrics:

Down in the valley, the valley so low
Hang your head over, hear the wind blow
Hear the wind blow, dear, hear the wind blow
Hang your head over, hear the wind blow

Write me a letter, send it by mail
Send it in care of Birmingham jail...
Birmingham jail, love, Birmingham jail
Send it in care of Birmingham jail

If you don't love me, love whom you please
Throw your arms 'round me, give my heart ease....
Give my heart ease, love, give my heart ease
Throw your arms 'round me, give my heart ease.

Build me a castle, 40 foot high
So I can see you, as you go by
As you go by love, as you go by
So I can see you, as you go by

I chose to create a work that had both personal meaning and also possibly meaning to the viewer as well. The valley that most naturally came to mind was Castro Valley, where I was born; as a result, I decided to use the city's outline as the starting point of the piece. Having not grown up in Castro Valley, I did not have any particular idea as to which direction to take -- so I googled "Castro Valley 1994," the year I was born. Article after article highlighted a tragic story of a young girl. I thought candles would be suitable, to serve as a sort of vigil for the young girl.

Giving the symbol some more thought, I realized candles could also represent a birthday. Blown out candles ("Hear the wind blow") could hold even more meaning: the passage of time, death, or the loss of something that used to burn bright. This would give it the personal meaning that I wanted to convey through the piece -- "Down in the Valley" is the only song I remember how to play on the piano, an instrument that I abandoned just as I approached my teen years. Looking back, I regret not continuing with lessons, but somehow I always go back to it leisurely every now and then, sitting down to play for a couple minutes. Just as candles may not last forever, but the smoke lingers there, if not forever, then at least for a little while.